Have you ever had one of those weeks where everything just goes the opposite of how you expect it to? I am having one of those weeks. You see, I was hoping that this little break from school would make me feel a little less stressed and more available. It turns out, I am more stressed out than I have ever been, and my social schedule is non-existent. I need to change that. Immediately.
So here is my conundrum: How do I have it all? I mean, I got the job I love. I have the friends I love. I have a dog I love. I have a place I love. So, when you boil it down, maybe I do have it all. Including the nasty skunk smell outside my house. Lovely!
I think that this fall will definitely be an eye-opener for me. I am ready. Now if only the skunk smell would go away.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Random Musing - September 26, 2010
Have you ever spent the entire day inside, in front of the TV and have done nothing at all? I have. Today. I got up, took Wally out, went back to bed, got up again, took Wally out, turned on the TV and nested. I watched football, surfed the net, talked to some friends, and awaited the start of the Amazing Race. And did I mention I didn't shower? Yeah, no... not me. I was officially sloth, kind of like a roommate I once had. The only thing missing was a tube of cookie dough and Days of Our Lives. Holy shit! What does this mean? Am I becoming a loner? Am I living a reclusive existence? No. Not at all. I needed a day like today. I needed to recharge. I needed to evaluate, identify, plan, and implement my next phase. You see, in the past few months, I realized I haven't been doing anything for myself. I mean, sure, I am in school, getting good grades. I am keeping up with people, either inter-personally or through the amazing world of Facebook, but I am still not shutting myself off from the world. I am making new friends and acquaintances, I am exploring the area around me, and getting lost in places like Watertown, Belmont, and Medford. I am enjoying the wonders of the city, on the cheap, but enjoying them nonetheless. But today... today was a day where I could just sit in a hoodie and a pair of shorts and do nothing! And think.
I need to change some things, this I know. In the past three months, I have lost 22 pounds. Not by exercising or watching what I eat, but simply from the stress of the world around me. I am starting to find outlets to appease my stress, but I welcome the weight loss. I mean, Friday I wore a pair of jeans that didn't fit me in January, but now they look, dare I say, good! So weight loss regime is on. I just need to do it in a healthier way, which means tomorrow, I am hunting down a gym and joining.
I need to care less about what others think and focus more on what I think. I mean, after all, Dr. Seuss said it best when he wrote "be who you are and say what you mean, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." I think that I have found a group of friends who completely embody that. It's time to be less concerned about fitting in and more concentrated on embracing how I stand out. I like standing out. I need to not be as worried about being judged because those who matter don't mind.
I need to realize that things come and go, and that there is a huge window of opportunity that is opening in front of me. My friend Lisa Richardson (some of you may know who she was) wrote in my yearbook: "Chris, you are an amazing person. Never set your sights too low.... shoot for the moon, and if you miss, don't worry, you will be among the stars." She was right. I miss her a lot. My dad gave me similar advice in his last month. He said, late one night, "Booby, you need to be who YOU are, not who you think others want you to be. You have made me proud, and I love you." I have never shared that before.
With that said, I think that with the change of seasons comes personal change. I am trying to be a better person. I have found several volunteer organizations where I can lend my time and give back. I feel really good about that.
On a more personal note, I think that most of you know that I am the type of gay that likes a good show tune. There, I admitted it. I will stay the pseudo indie-hipster I am, but if a Sondheim song comes on, you know this bitch will work it out. And even though they made Xanadu into a musical, I am partial to this. Sure, it's the kids from Glee, but if ever a show tune spoke to me, it is this part of the song:
I'm through accepting limits 'cause someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change But till I try, I'll never know!
Too long I've been afraid of Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love It comes at much too high a cost!
I'd sooner buy Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down
New season, new attitude. I am through with people pulling, and putting me, down. Something has changed within me, something is not the same. I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game!
I need to change some things, this I know. In the past three months, I have lost 22 pounds. Not by exercising or watching what I eat, but simply from the stress of the world around me. I am starting to find outlets to appease my stress, but I welcome the weight loss. I mean, Friday I wore a pair of jeans that didn't fit me in January, but now they look, dare I say, good! So weight loss regime is on. I just need to do it in a healthier way, which means tomorrow, I am hunting down a gym and joining.
I need to care less about what others think and focus more on what I think. I mean, after all, Dr. Seuss said it best when he wrote "be who you are and say what you mean, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." I think that I have found a group of friends who completely embody that. It's time to be less concerned about fitting in and more concentrated on embracing how I stand out. I like standing out. I need to not be as worried about being judged because those who matter don't mind.
I need to realize that things come and go, and that there is a huge window of opportunity that is opening in front of me. My friend Lisa Richardson (some of you may know who she was) wrote in my yearbook: "Chris, you are an amazing person. Never set your sights too low.... shoot for the moon, and if you miss, don't worry, you will be among the stars." She was right. I miss her a lot. My dad gave me similar advice in his last month. He said, late one night, "Booby, you need to be who YOU are, not who you think others want you to be. You have made me proud, and I love you." I have never shared that before.
With that said, I think that with the change of seasons comes personal change. I am trying to be a better person. I have found several volunteer organizations where I can lend my time and give back. I feel really good about that.
On a more personal note, I think that most of you know that I am the type of gay that likes a good show tune. There, I admitted it. I will stay the pseudo indie-hipster I am, but if a Sondheim song comes on, you know this bitch will work it out. And even though they made Xanadu into a musical, I am partial to this. Sure, it's the kids from Glee, but if ever a show tune spoke to me, it is this part of the song:
I'm through accepting limits 'cause someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change But till I try, I'll never know!
Too long I've been afraid of Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love It comes at much too high a cost!
I'd sooner buy Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down
New season, new attitude. I am through with people pulling, and putting me, down. Something has changed within me, something is not the same. I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game!
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Random Musing - Spetember 22, 2010
It's been a whole week since I last wrote. I have a lot to say.
For starters, this has been a very weird week for me. I think it started on Sunday when I realized how alone I felt. Late night, iPod on, I realized that it was just me, listening to Rogue Wave. Now Rogue Wave isn't one of those bands that exudes a ton of meaning, but listening to "Lake Michigan" I was sucked in. It doesn't talk about loneliness or pining, but it speaks.
Then we had an appreciation lunch for our philanthropic endeavors at work. Now, I am flattered that I was invited, but what I did, to me, doesn't scream "giving back." My idea was to have every employee donate $5 to dress casual and the proceeds went to purchase supplies for the troops overseas. Now, I don't personally know anyone overseas, fighting for my freedom, but I am appreciative and full of pride knowing that there are people out there doing it. My gratitude is endless. I felt proud of being able to go and buy the supplies to make care packages for the troops. It was a life-changing experience, especially after being told "Thank You" by a woman whose young son was serving in Iraq.
I am not a giving person. I am not as charitable as I should be, at least I don't feel that way. I have been told, by many mind you, that I am a good person, but I don't feel it. I wish there was something more that I could do.
Which brings me to this: as a token of appreciation, all of the employees involved in our initiative were given a book called "How Many People Does it Take to Make a Difference?" Truth is, it is only one. Well, that's what the book's cover said. As I thumbed through the book, and tried to choke back tears, I was moved by one of the quotes. It said "there are only so many tomorrows." Tomorrow. We put off today what we can do tomorrow. But what if tomorrow doesn't come. I lost my dad at when he was a mere 62 years old. That's young, especially given the statistics on how long we live. His tomorrow never came. And he was a good man. A great man. A man I wish I was more like, and more importantly, who I try to be like. You know I miss him terribly, and even as I write this, I choke back the tears knowing he isn't here to celebrate my triumphs, comfort me when I am down, and bitch about UGA football.
There are only so many tomorrows.
I think about what I have to do tomorrow. I have to wake up and walk my dog; a dog which makes my life complete, even though he whines constantly and is the neediest dog in the world, but he is mine and I saved him. He is my world. My life would be empty without Wally in it. Incredibly empty. How I can love something this much makes me realize that I do have something in me to make the world a better place, at least for a dog.
I need to go to work. I am not one of the millions of people who are without work. In fact, I have what may be my dream job. I interact with people. I work with a great team. I have people who seek my feedback and take it to heart. It's not a "have to," it's a privilege to be able to go to work everyday and love what I do. "If you love what you do, you will never work another day in your life" - Confucius. He was right!
I need to pay bills, make dinner, and take care of myself. I have the ability to do that. I am lucky. Luckier than most in the world. I wish I could see that.
I need to reach out to my family and friends to check in. It's my nature. I love my family. I love my sister. I love my mother. I love them because at the end of the day, I have them to lean on, even if I am a shit. They see beyond it. They see past the superficial. They see past the bullshit. They see me for who I am. I love that I have the connection I have with them. My friends, old and new, are there regardless. Coworkers, old friends, new friends, they get me. I have wonderful people in my life. When I am blue, I know that the girls are a phone call away, and just the sound of their voices puts a smile on my face. I am so fortunate to have these relationships that have spanned decades. I am more fortunate that I have relationships that have spanned weeks and months, too. Since my move, I have met people that I know I wouldn't have if I hadn't made a life-changing decision.
I need to think about school. Even though I am on a break from my education, I have the ability to seek it out. I am lucky. I am earning my masters and bettering myself, and have been told how amazing I am for working and going to school. I wouldn't have it any other way.
I need to be more philanthropic. Which leads me to this question. What can I get involved in to be more philanthropic? I want to give back more. I want to make sure my tomorrows count.
I leave you with this. I love this song, especially the line that says "Gotta keep faith that your path will change. Gotta keep faith that your luck will change, tomorrow!" It will. I know this. I have an incredible network. I am so fortunate that so many have given back to me. It's time to pay it forward.
For starters, this has been a very weird week for me. I think it started on Sunday when I realized how alone I felt. Late night, iPod on, I realized that it was just me, listening to Rogue Wave. Now Rogue Wave isn't one of those bands that exudes a ton of meaning, but listening to "Lake Michigan" I was sucked in. It doesn't talk about loneliness or pining, but it speaks.
Then we had an appreciation lunch for our philanthropic endeavors at work. Now, I am flattered that I was invited, but what I did, to me, doesn't scream "giving back." My idea was to have every employee donate $5 to dress casual and the proceeds went to purchase supplies for the troops overseas. Now, I don't personally know anyone overseas, fighting for my freedom, but I am appreciative and full of pride knowing that there are people out there doing it. My gratitude is endless. I felt proud of being able to go and buy the supplies to make care packages for the troops. It was a life-changing experience, especially after being told "Thank You" by a woman whose young son was serving in Iraq.
I am not a giving person. I am not as charitable as I should be, at least I don't feel that way. I have been told, by many mind you, that I am a good person, but I don't feel it. I wish there was something more that I could do.
Which brings me to this: as a token of appreciation, all of the employees involved in our initiative were given a book called "How Many People Does it Take to Make a Difference?" Truth is, it is only one. Well, that's what the book's cover said. As I thumbed through the book, and tried to choke back tears, I was moved by one of the quotes. It said "there are only so many tomorrows." Tomorrow. We put off today what we can do tomorrow. But what if tomorrow doesn't come. I lost my dad at when he was a mere 62 years old. That's young, especially given the statistics on how long we live. His tomorrow never came. And he was a good man. A great man. A man I wish I was more like, and more importantly, who I try to be like. You know I miss him terribly, and even as I write this, I choke back the tears knowing he isn't here to celebrate my triumphs, comfort me when I am down, and bitch about UGA football.
There are only so many tomorrows.
I think about what I have to do tomorrow. I have to wake up and walk my dog; a dog which makes my life complete, even though he whines constantly and is the neediest dog in the world, but he is mine and I saved him. He is my world. My life would be empty without Wally in it. Incredibly empty. How I can love something this much makes me realize that I do have something in me to make the world a better place, at least for a dog.
I need to go to work. I am not one of the millions of people who are without work. In fact, I have what may be my dream job. I interact with people. I work with a great team. I have people who seek my feedback and take it to heart. It's not a "have to," it's a privilege to be able to go to work everyday and love what I do. "If you love what you do, you will never work another day in your life" - Confucius. He was right!
I need to pay bills, make dinner, and take care of myself. I have the ability to do that. I am lucky. Luckier than most in the world. I wish I could see that.
I need to reach out to my family and friends to check in. It's my nature. I love my family. I love my sister. I love my mother. I love them because at the end of the day, I have them to lean on, even if I am a shit. They see beyond it. They see past the superficial. They see past the bullshit. They see me for who I am. I love that I have the connection I have with them. My friends, old and new, are there regardless. Coworkers, old friends, new friends, they get me. I have wonderful people in my life. When I am blue, I know that the girls are a phone call away, and just the sound of their voices puts a smile on my face. I am so fortunate to have these relationships that have spanned decades. I am more fortunate that I have relationships that have spanned weeks and months, too. Since my move, I have met people that I know I wouldn't have if I hadn't made a life-changing decision.
I need to think about school. Even though I am on a break from my education, I have the ability to seek it out. I am lucky. I am earning my masters and bettering myself, and have been told how amazing I am for working and going to school. I wouldn't have it any other way.
I need to be more philanthropic. Which leads me to this question. What can I get involved in to be more philanthropic? I want to give back more. I want to make sure my tomorrows count.
I leave you with this. I love this song, especially the line that says "Gotta keep faith that your path will change. Gotta keep faith that your luck will change, tomorrow!" It will. I know this. I have an incredible network. I am so fortunate that so many have given back to me. It's time to pay it forward.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Random Musing - September 15, 2010
Tonight, I got a lot of thinking about those who come and go from our lives. Some stay forever, some, just a short while. Since my move to the city, I have been introduced to several new people who I am incredibly excited to have met, and I have lost connections along the way. The one person though who isn't there is my dad. I know I write a lot about my dad, but tonight is different. You see, I was cleaning off my desktop tonight of all the old grad school papers I wrote for other classes and I came across a file called "Eulogy." I forgot that it was on my desktop and I opened it. And I cried. A lot. I miss my dad something awful, especially this time of year. Even as a gay man, I can still talk sports, and I think that my dad had a lot to do with that. I mean, I would recap the football games with him every weekend when he was here. Watching football isn't the same, but I know that if I didn't do it, I wouldn't be able to fondly remember my dad. So, as I am going through the eulogy I wrote, I realized how short, simple, and to the point it was; just like my dad was. I know this is self-serving, but I feel it is appropriate, so I will share it with you.
Thank you all for coming today to share in the memory of my father’s life. Most of you knew Ron Blasdel in some capacity or another. I knew him only as my dad; the guy that no matter what was there when I needed him. Over the past few days, I have heard many things stated about my dad. That he was larger than life; that he was always had a big grin on his face; that he enjoyed life. What I knew about my dad was this: he loved his family. He and my mother Maureen celebrated forty years of marriage earlier this year. He loved talking about his grandchildren Nicholas, William, and Samantha. He looked forward to visits from my sister Amy and her husband, Rob and from myself and my partner Bob. He loved playing Brady to Moss with his dog Molly. He loved the Sunday phone calls, the holiday meals, the birthdays, and just spending time with his family. Most of you know my dad was an avid golfer and nothing made him happier than swinging a club and playing 18. He loved living in Hilton Head and would always let us know that it was “another beautiful day in the Low Country” regardless of the time of year it was. My dad loved his cigars, and his second favorite pastime was when he was engrossed in a good book with a good cigar. At the end of the day, my dad loved many things, but it was his family he loved the most. Everything else was just the gravy on top. So today, as we mourn this loss and work on mending the enormous, larger than life hole that we have been left, we should keep the memories and stories we have of Ron, my dad, with us.
As I recollect the past, and feel that I have a guardian angel over me, making sure I make smart, if not always the right choices. He always said "that's just the gravy, Christopher, don't worry about it." I never got that until I was older. I am realizing that the gravy these days is anything exciting that happens in my life.
So tonight, I share two things with you. The first is a photograph taken in 2007. My mom and dad took myself and my partner to Charleston for a night. It was an incredible evening, and my dad, being a huge history buff, was in his element.
Dad, me and Mom, November 2007
The second thing is this. My dad loved The Beatles, and he definitely passed that on to me. I love this song because it speaks volumes and there is an eternal message attached to it. "And in the end, the love you take, is equal to the love you make." You all know I miss my dad something awful, and this blog not only serves as an outlet to get the creative juices flowing, but it allows me to really remember the impact my dad has made on me. I am a better person, the person I am today, because I had such an amazing role model.
Monday, September 13, 2010
Random Musing - September 13, 2010
Wine. I love it. Everyone should. There is something about the fact that grapes can ferment and turn into this amazingly delicious substance that I love. Now, I am not wino and I don't drink cheap wine or ripple, but I gotta tell you, I love it. I was thinking today a lot about wine and how many memories of my past are wine induced. My favorite trip ever: Wine Country. A favorite memory of youth: drinking table wine with my host family on my first night in Chainaz Les Frases in France. Recent wine memory: opening a magnum of St. Supery Elu with my oldest and dearest friends and toasting in the glasses that were given to my parents as a wedding gift.
As you can see, wine plays a significant role in my life. And not in a creepy way. Today I got a call from a former co-worker and a dear friend who asked me to make plans. We have a slumber party weekend in the works and her one request: make sure you have wine. God, I love you Court! You know me too well. There will be wine. There will be music. There will be dance offs. But most of all, there will be memories made to last a lifetime.
Life is what happens when you're making other plans. It's time I take life by the balls, live it up, and of course, enjoy the wine. I hope you do too! Cheers!
As you can see, wine plays a significant role in my life. And not in a creepy way. Today I got a call from a former co-worker and a dear friend who asked me to make plans. We have a slumber party weekend in the works and her one request: make sure you have wine. God, I love you Court! You know me too well. There will be wine. There will be music. There will be dance offs. But most of all, there will be memories made to last a lifetime.
Life is what happens when you're making other plans. It's time I take life by the balls, live it up, and of course, enjoy the wine. I hope you do too! Cheers!
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Random Musing - September 11, 2010
Today is September 11th, and we as Americans are told to reflect on what happened nine years ago. They say that if you were alive when Kennedy was assassinated, you never forgot where you were. The same holds true for September 11th. I remember exactly where I was: I was at my desk at Putnam Investments in Andover, MA and heard "someone flew a plane into the World Trade Center." I thought nothing of it. But I went to Boston.com and watched, in horror, as the live footage showed another plane crashing into the tower. Those events on that day will stick with me for the rest of mine, and everyone else's, life. The thing I remember is having a co-worker tell me "My brother is on his way to LA this morning, I hope he is ok." Being the eternal optimist that I am, I reassured her that he was and to check in to see which flight he was on. Sadly, he was on Flight 11, and I was wrong with my comforting words. That is something I will never forget. Nor will I forget about all the lives lost on that day, especially of those willing to help out complete strangers to get them to safety. I have a lot of respect for firefighters and police, and get incredibly upset whenever I hear something bad has happened to someone who is out there protecting me. Today I reflected. I thought a lot about the last nine years and how I curse the TSA for making me take off my shoes, empty my bags, and hold up the lines at the airport. I know this is necessary, but I resent what happened on September 11th and how we still pay the price.
In the last nine years, I have had five jobs, three relationships, one husband, two dogs, several losses, and umpteen people come into my life who have become great friends. I have had three cars, three different pant sizes, four gym memberships, six cell phones, and my world collapse around me. I have been to a dozen weddings, two christenings, a million concerts, and several sporting events. Needless to say, there has been a lot going on in the last nine years. Today though, I reflected on those I knew, through six degrees of separation, of those who lost their lives to a bunch of fanatical zealots in the name of religion. And you know what? It really fucking sucks that there are people out there like that.
So tonight, after all is said and done; after we have all reflected, observed our moments of silence and thought about the events that transpired nine years ago, I can only think of one thing: hope. A hope that our world becomes a better place. A hope that future generations don't have to pay for the mistakes we make today. A hope that, no matter what, at the end of the day, we continue to love, support, and help each other. Listen to this and enjoy!
In the last nine years, I have had five jobs, three relationships, one husband, two dogs, several losses, and umpteen people come into my life who have become great friends. I have had three cars, three different pant sizes, four gym memberships, six cell phones, and my world collapse around me. I have been to a dozen weddings, two christenings, a million concerts, and several sporting events. Needless to say, there has been a lot going on in the last nine years. Today though, I reflected on those I knew, through six degrees of separation, of those who lost their lives to a bunch of fanatical zealots in the name of religion. And you know what? It really fucking sucks that there are people out there like that.
So tonight, after all is said and done; after we have all reflected, observed our moments of silence and thought about the events that transpired nine years ago, I can only think of one thing: hope. A hope that our world becomes a better place. A hope that future generations don't have to pay for the mistakes we make today. A hope that, no matter what, at the end of the day, we continue to love, support, and help each other. Listen to this and enjoy!
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Random Musings - September 7, 2010
It's official! School is back in session. I felt it on my ride to work today. It took an extra ten minutes and the sighting of several frazzled parents who forget they have children in the car when they cut me off. (To the lady with the 80s bangs and tapered jeans who pulled out in front of me on Moody St. in Waltham today, you're welcome! But don't flip people off when they let you go, ok?)
I loved this time of year when I was a kid. I loved school. I loved textbooks, notebooks, pens, folders, binders, anything really that would be considered a school supply. I remember covering my textbooks with Market Basket bags, and writing the class name on it in big, black, permanent marker, than gradually adding doodles and names of my favorite bands to them. Call me a geek, but I loved taking copious notes, studying for tests, answering questions in class, and making my friends laugh at my stories. Most of all, though, I remember how AWESOME my wardrobe was. You see, even as a child, I was a clothes whore and label hound. If it didn't say Z. Cavaricci, IOU, Skidz, Girbaud, or Adidas on it, I didn't wear it (until I was a junior, when I found the Gap and thought bright oranges and yellows looked good one me). I was fashion forward, and always tried to look good. You can imagine how disappointed I was when I wasn't named best dressed, but instead, most talkative, as a senior. Even though I was all about my appearance, it ate me up that I couldn't be "the real me" when I was in high school.
As I grow older, there are some habits that never die. I still love my clothes, though I am learning that I don't always need a new pair of Hudsons when I see them. I still love to take copious notes in meetings at work (it helps me cover my bases). And I love making my friends laugh with my stories.
I have felt a little nostalgic today, thinking about my Junior year in high school. I remember driving all over the place, cranking up my stereo and having a good time. It was the beginning of the me I was to become, and I loved it. With that being said, I remember listening to tape loudly and being mocked for not listening to the popular stuff. I love this song. It made me want to pack up, go to college, and find my flock. Enjoy!
I loved this time of year when I was a kid. I loved school. I loved textbooks, notebooks, pens, folders, binders, anything really that would be considered a school supply. I remember covering my textbooks with Market Basket bags, and writing the class name on it in big, black, permanent marker, than gradually adding doodles and names of my favorite bands to them. Call me a geek, but I loved taking copious notes, studying for tests, answering questions in class, and making my friends laugh at my stories. Most of all, though, I remember how AWESOME my wardrobe was. You see, even as a child, I was a clothes whore and label hound. If it didn't say Z. Cavaricci, IOU, Skidz, Girbaud, or Adidas on it, I didn't wear it (until I was a junior, when I found the Gap and thought bright oranges and yellows looked good one me). I was fashion forward, and always tried to look good. You can imagine how disappointed I was when I wasn't named best dressed, but instead, most talkative, as a senior. Even though I was all about my appearance, it ate me up that I couldn't be "the real me" when I was in high school.
As I grow older, there are some habits that never die. I still love my clothes, though I am learning that I don't always need a new pair of Hudsons when I see them. I still love to take copious notes in meetings at work (it helps me cover my bases). And I love making my friends laugh with my stories.
I have felt a little nostalgic today, thinking about my Junior year in high school. I remember driving all over the place, cranking up my stereo and having a good time. It was the beginning of the me I was to become, and I loved it. With that being said, I remember listening to tape loudly and being mocked for not listening to the popular stuff. I love this song. It made me want to pack up, go to college, and find my flock. Enjoy!
Monday, September 6, 2010
Random Musing - September 6, 2010
I spent the day today with my boys on a deck in Cambridge. It was a perfect end to the summer, and I couldn't be happier.
I have been thinking a lot about the impending change of season. You see, in New England, we go from holy fucking shit hot to dear god, where is my jacket cool overnight. I feel it is right around the corner. I am looking forward to the leaves changing, the apples getting picked, and the comfort food being cooked. You see, I love this time of year for food alone. Call it nesting. Call it a sick love between man and food. Call it whatever you'd like, but I can't tell you how happy I will be to come home from work, preheat the oven, pull the casserole out of the fridge and wait an hour for warm, yummy goodness in front of the TV with Wally on my lap. The fall is when I saw screw it and order dessert out, or make them from scratch at home. It is when words like football, wings, and beer are staples in my vocabulary.
It's not only the food that changes, but my wardrobe as well. I go from short sleeve to long sleeve t-shirts, hoodies and sweaters, and jeans (or maybe shorts). I pack away the beach wear, the flip flops, the bathing suits. I rotate my shoe collection around, and break out my workboots, dress boots, hiking boots, and heavy sneakers. I change my work wardrobe around from khakis and polos to wool trousers and dress shirts. This time of year allows me to step it up a bit.
My habits change, too. I tend to want to be out more when the weather cools. I tend to be more social as the foliage changes. I enjoy house parties, gatherings, and cocktail parties with my friends. I get more and more creative with my libations. I put away the blender and the ice for warmer, stronger cocktails.
I welcome the fall. This one feels different. I feel that even though with all the changes going on around me, there is a sense of comfort in these changes.
My fall album for the past several years has been Oasis' "What's the Story (Morning Glory)." It came out at a very special place in my life, in the fall, and has always kind of stuck with me. My favorite song on the entire album is "Don't Look Back in Anger." I may not have been in a rock and roll band, but I do find a ton of meaning through music. So, I celebrate one of my fall favorites with you!
I have been thinking a lot about the impending change of season. You see, in New England, we go from holy fucking shit hot to dear god, where is my jacket cool overnight. I feel it is right around the corner. I am looking forward to the leaves changing, the apples getting picked, and the comfort food being cooked. You see, I love this time of year for food alone. Call it nesting. Call it a sick love between man and food. Call it whatever you'd like, but I can't tell you how happy I will be to come home from work, preheat the oven, pull the casserole out of the fridge and wait an hour for warm, yummy goodness in front of the TV with Wally on my lap. The fall is when I saw screw it and order dessert out, or make them from scratch at home. It is when words like football, wings, and beer are staples in my vocabulary.
It's not only the food that changes, but my wardrobe as well. I go from short sleeve to long sleeve t-shirts, hoodies and sweaters, and jeans (or maybe shorts). I pack away the beach wear, the flip flops, the bathing suits. I rotate my shoe collection around, and break out my workboots, dress boots, hiking boots, and heavy sneakers. I change my work wardrobe around from khakis and polos to wool trousers and dress shirts. This time of year allows me to step it up a bit.
My habits change, too. I tend to want to be out more when the weather cools. I tend to be more social as the foliage changes. I enjoy house parties, gatherings, and cocktail parties with my friends. I get more and more creative with my libations. I put away the blender and the ice for warmer, stronger cocktails.
I welcome the fall. This one feels different. I feel that even though with all the changes going on around me, there is a sense of comfort in these changes.
My fall album for the past several years has been Oasis' "What's the Story (Morning Glory)." It came out at a very special place in my life, in the fall, and has always kind of stuck with me. My favorite song on the entire album is "Don't Look Back in Anger." I may not have been in a rock and roll band, but I do find a ton of meaning through music. So, I celebrate one of my fall favorites with you!
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Random Musing - September 5, 2010
Today, I was thinking a lot about movies I remember as kid. I remember being mesmerized by them and thinking "one day, my life will be JUST LIKE THIS!" Fortunately, I haven't skated into a wall a la Xanadu, got my heart ripped out and trampled on a la Pretty in Pink, or had a wild adventure a la Goonies. But I feel I am living. I am living a life that is EXACTLY what I wanted, even if it comes with a price.
Kurt Cobain said waiting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are. I think this really resonates with me. I have always wanted to be someone else. Someone thinner and more muscley, someone wealthier, someone with "everything." As I get older, I realize the things I have in life money can't buy, the body I have is what I have, and even though I may not be wealthy, I am happy and content. Happiness happens when you least expect it. I am realizing that.
With that said, tonight's random musing is that regardless of everything that is going on in my life, when I step back, I know that at the end of the day, as long as there is a roof over my head, a dog in my lap, and the comfort of friends, I am truly a very happy guy. So, I leave you with Morrissey. Anyone who REALLY knows me knows that I relate to Morrissey more than any other artist. This sums me up!
Kurt Cobain said waiting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are. I think this really resonates with me. I have always wanted to be someone else. Someone thinner and more muscley, someone wealthier, someone with "everything." As I get older, I realize the things I have in life money can't buy, the body I have is what I have, and even though I may not be wealthy, I am happy and content. Happiness happens when you least expect it. I am realizing that.
With that said, tonight's random musing is that regardless of everything that is going on in my life, when I step back, I know that at the end of the day, as long as there is a roof over my head, a dog in my lap, and the comfort of friends, I am truly a very happy guy. So, I leave you with Morrissey. Anyone who REALLY knows me knows that I relate to Morrissey more than any other artist. This sums me up!
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Random Musings - September 1, 2010
Labor day weekend is right around the corner. I am starting to really hate this time of year. You see, last year for Labor Day weekend, I flew down to Hilton Head to spend the weekend with my dad who was recently diagnosed with cancer a few weeks prior, and my mom, to lend her a little support. I remember picking up the car at the airport, landing later than I expected, and heading over to the the gated community where my folks live. I remember the heaviness of the air, the Spanish moss under the moonlight, and the smell of my dad in his car. And I remember my dad. He didn't look like himself. He was gaunt and so thin in the face, but regardless of the physical differences, I remember how he lit up when I walked into the house and how he got up from his chair and gave me a Big Daddy hug like I remembered as a kid. Except, it wasn't my dad. It was this shell of him, dwindling away. But the light in his eyes was still there. I loved this weekend, though it was the last one where my dad was really able to function with limited help. It was the beginning of the end.
So, this weekend I dread will be incredibly painful. I will conjure up memories of my dad, both good and bad, and realize how empty it is without him around. I will watch Georgia football, and hope my Bulldogs win big, but won't make the celebratory phone call to Big Daddy. I will grill something, but it won't have the same taste as it did when my dad grilled out.
I have realized a lot over the past few months that no one is ever replaceable in our lives. People come and go from our lives for a reason and purpose. There are reasons the people in my life, old and new, are here. I am a firm believer in this. I welcome it. I embrace it.
So, if you read this, and feel something, think about the people in your life, past and present. Think of the impact they have left on you. Think about the impact you have left on them. Lately, I have been listening to a lot of music from my awkward college years. This song came out my Freshman year of college - a time where I was going through a tough transition in my own life. The lyrics are enough to drive any 19 year old in love crazy. I hope you can connect to it to.
Happy Labor Day. Be safe this weekend!
So, this weekend I dread will be incredibly painful. I will conjure up memories of my dad, both good and bad, and realize how empty it is without him around. I will watch Georgia football, and hope my Bulldogs win big, but won't make the celebratory phone call to Big Daddy. I will grill something, but it won't have the same taste as it did when my dad grilled out.
I have realized a lot over the past few months that no one is ever replaceable in our lives. People come and go from our lives for a reason and purpose. There are reasons the people in my life, old and new, are here. I am a firm believer in this. I welcome it. I embrace it.
So, if you read this, and feel something, think about the people in your life, past and present. Think of the impact they have left on you. Think about the impact you have left on them. Lately, I have been listening to a lot of music from my awkward college years. This song came out my Freshman year of college - a time where I was going through a tough transition in my own life. The lyrics are enough to drive any 19 year old in love crazy. I hope you can connect to it to.
Happy Labor Day. Be safe this weekend!
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